Cultural Sensitivity in Foster Care: Embracing Diversity in Southern California’s Resource Families

Southern California’s foster children represent a diverse population and come from a variety of different backgrounds. The foster kids who enter your house may have different beliefs, customs, languages, and ways of expressing themselves. To create a supportive home environment where everyone feels that their identity is respected, we’ve created this blog—which includes helpful advice for embracing cultural differences and creating a space where kids feel accepted! 

Cultural Humility

Cultural humility is a lifelong process of self-reflection and learning about other cultures that aims to build understanding and respect for cultural differences.

Identity describes a person’s sense of self. Identity matters to almost everyone and is deeply connected to culture and self-worth. Many foster kids are at risk of losing their identities as the result of unexpected life changes, like being separated from their biological parents, moving to a new community, starting a new school, and living in a home where the culture and traditions may differ from what they’ve known. One way to combat cultural identity loss is by understanding and engaging with foster kid’s native and adopted cultures. (Native culture describes national, religious, and ethnic identities, while adopted cultures could be something like a child’s sexual orientation or particular subcultures they identify with, like fandoms).

Culture is an important part of identity and describes the values, beliefs, ways of communication, and practices shared by a group to create a sense of unity. Children need to feel connected with people, places and things they care about to have a grounded sense of self, and finding ways to connect kids with their culture of origin supports self-worth. At Kamali’i Foster Family Agency, we want foster kids to feel pride, belonging, and a connection, which is why we encourage resource parents to find ways to connect their kids with their culture of origin. This might mean observing coming-of-age rituals (like mitzvahs and quinceaneras) or something as simple as learning to make a child’s favorite food from their native culture. 

To create safe environments where kids feel respected, it’s important to be on guard against microaggressions. The way we treat people’s differences can negatively impact self-worth. ‘Isms’ (racism, classicism, imbalances of power) affect identity. For example, 25% of foster kids identify as LGBTQ, and LGBTQ males who report feeling rejected by families are 18% more likely to attempt suicide. 

Tips for Kids with Textured Hair

Culture can be expressed through an individual’s personal appearance. Clothes and hairstyles are important parts of self-expression. However, not every one’s hair is the same, and kids with especially textured hair may have differences in hair care and personal hygiene that, when left unchecked, can be a source of cultural conflict. 

Kids need to feel their best and also have a way to express their cultural heritage and natural beauty. Kids with curly and textured hair may have different needs, so we created this list of hair care tips that we learned from expert stylist and businesswoman stylist Angelica Taylor:

1. 1. 1. Textured hair only needs to be washed every 10-14 days. Overwashing can remove essential oils that help hair from becoming dry and frizzy.
      2. Still condition regularly.
      3. Don’t scrub textured hair because it goes against the curl pattern, creating friction and fuzz.
      4. Only use a dime to quarter-sized squirt of shampoo and conditioner (this tip applies to everybody).
      5. Even though you need to wash textured hair less, you still need to clean the scalp regularly. Oil buildup on the scalp can hurt hair growth and create an unpleasant smell. One way to clean the scalp is by spraying apple cider vinegar, lemon juice, and warm water and letting it sit to remove oil.
      6. When using chemical relaxers, it’s best to get treatments done at a salon.
      7. Relaxers change the pH level of your child’s hair, which could cause it to react negatively to chlorine, such as in pools.
      8. If you’re spending a lot on your child’s hair, you should also be willing to spend a bit more on hair care.
      9. Shampoos at major retailers are likely expired, making them less effective.
      10. Everyone is different. You have to find what works for your child 🙂

You can view the entire video, complete with amazing advice from Angelica here:

Tips for braided hair care

Many African American kids like braids because it makes hair easier to manage. Some braids can last up to 12 weeks! Fox braids last really long and are extremely versatile. You do not need to condition braided hair, but still make sure to wash out the oil to prevent smell.

LGBT

Kids these days have more sexual and gender identities than ever, and the list seems to keep expanding. As a resource parent, it can feel like a lot to keep up with. No matter how your foster child self-identifies, the same virtues of humility, sympathy, openness, and understanding will help them navigate the coming out process and bring you even closer together. 

Everyone is probably familiar with the orientations lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transitioning. But what about the other letters that keep making their way in and out of the LGBT acronym.

• • • • • Queer can describe an identity that falls outside the categories of man or woman and is often used by nonbinary people who feel that existing identities are too limiting. This word, which has historically been used as a slur, has been largely reclaimed by the gay community but is still not universally accepted.

        • Intersex indicates that this person has different chromosomes than the typical male/female combinations (XX or XY), or their internal and external sexual organs may differ from what’s traditionally considered male or female.

        • Asexual describes a person who experiences little to no sexual attraction or experiences sexual attraction in a non-normative way.

There are still more sexual and gender orientations, often represented by the ‘+’ in ‘LGBTQ+’. (Even more than the colors in the rainbow—literally!) But this should cover most bases. However, if you encounter previously unknown orientations outside this subset that are being used to describe someone you care about, we encourage you to dive into the research and learn more. 

The degree to which LGBTQ+ youth feel supported and accepted by the people around them directly impacts their mental health. 42% of LGBT youth have considered suicide in the last year, they have a 120% higher risk of becoming homeless and are six more likely to experience depression, which is why your support is so important. Studies show that support from just one adult can decrease suicide ideation, plans, and attempts by nearly half. Similarly, according to the Trevor Project, transgender and nonbinary youth who have their pronoun choice respected by most people in their life attempt suicide at half the rate.

Here are some important things you should know about coming out:

• The average age of coming out keeps getting younger and younger.

• Coming out is a continual process and not a one and done conversation.

• The best thing you can do for someone coming out is to remind them they’re unconditionally loved.

Safety and support are key to creating a place where youth feel free to express themselves and live their best lives. Equally as important as coming out is to foster teens in the process of inviting them in. Inviting in is a parallel process that happens in tandem with coming out. This process can be viewed as a great honor as it takes a lot of trust to invite another person in. You’re not expected to have all the answers but rather to be supportive and open-minded. It’s ok just to be present and receptive. And don’t be afraid to ask questions! Be honest about not knowing, but also be aware that it’s not your foster child’s responsibility to hold your hand throughout this process. 

The ideal coming-out process might include the following statements/questions from a resource parent:

• Thank you for sharing this.

• How can I support you?

• Is there anything else you would like to share?

• Absolutely nothing has changed.

• I’m going to do my best to support you.

• I accept you the way you are.

As with all cultures, it’s important to be on guard against microaggressions. Microaggressions may not be intended to cause harm, but often do. These sorts of actions can cause LGBT who haven’t come out to internalize “this is not ok”.

If you know an LGBTQ+ youth who may be struggling, consider contacting a social worker.

Wrapping Up

For additional resources and to learn more about embracing differences, check out our resource page.